My secret is that I have no clue. Ever. I daily wing life. As much as I desire plans, I rarely have them. And when I do, God seems to change them pretty darn fast.
My secret is that I'm scared to death of graduation because life changes after it. May 2 marks the end of an amazing season of my life.
My secret is that I've never been so excited about being scared. Even though its the end of one season, its the beginning of another beautiful one.
My not-so-secret is that today my plans changed. In the Fall I interviewed to work for MFuge. I was a camper in the 9th grade and loved it. I've wanted to work for Fuge since then. Well, I got an email in February saying that I was put on the waiting list. Being the impatient person that I am, I told them never mind. I said to take me off the list. I felt like I needed definite plans. Leaving stuff up in the air kills me. (Did you notice how many 'I's and 'me's there were?) So, I forgot about my desire to work camp. I found a job with a private school teaching an elementary summer program. My secret is that, even though I've worked with little kids a lot, I crave interaction with older kids--kids whose noses I don't have to wipe, or that I don't have to escort to the bathroom. I was content with this plan. It would pay the bills. And that was what mattered, right? Well, Tuesday night I go to BCM as always. I love Tuesday nights. We had a time of quiet prayer. I've been on the verge of breaking for awhile. Like I said, I'm scared about my life changing. Well I poured myself out God. I told Him how much I want to please Him in what I do and that I don't care what I'm doing or where I am as long as I'm where He is. I don't care about His will for my life anymore. I just want to care about His will in general. I just want to be used by Him for His purposes and for His glory. I'm sick of it being about me. I'm sick of asking Him to focus on me, when I'm not fully focused on Him. Long story short, I get an email Wednesday morning saying that MFuge has an opening in Birmingham. They never took me off the list. How amazing is that? My secret is that I need to be a bit more patient and trusting.
Awesome Misti! God will do amazing things with you as long as you continue allowing Him to do His thing. I am excited to see where He leads you! Glad you are blogging as well.
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